I read Quiet and I understood

March 19, 2018July 31, 2019 / jonathan / Leave a comment

A kid crying in a noisy family event. Not leaving his mom’s leg. Listen to him. He is trying to say something.

Closing room’s door, listening to air condition’s white noise, is not weird.

Not feeling an equal partner in high school’s cool group, but seeking this one close friend, is not anti social.

Wanting and not wanting to be part of this cool group, is an introvert not knowing he is one.

Feeling physically uncomfortable and sweaty while waiting in lines, is related to your nervous system.

Feeling not in and not out during every scouts activity. Feeling that not attending scouts activity is a bit giving up. Well it is not.

Friday night, empty house, reading and staring in the rain, is the biggest fun ever. This one I actually always knew 🙂

Thanks Susan 🙂 Let’s raise our kids with these amazing findings in our head. Each time we feel an itch why they are a bit different. Well they are not.

Don’t fit us to the Success model

March 15, 2018July 25, 2019 / jonathan / 1 Comment

How many different models are there to reach “success”?

Not enough. Actually one.

The lack of information and laziness cause us to put things in boxes.

Here is the model in the box:

Be Assertive, it’s ok to be Aggressive. After all you are running towards the Vision. You are a Visionaire and an Executor. Execution is all.

Important to be Result Driven and Focused. Use your Charisma to lead and tell the story. Decide Fast. Break Something.

Tell a Story. Hopefully it’s close to reality but not a must.

Outcome => This model fits a specific group. For some of us it is unnatural, we feel second best and frustrated.

We really don’t need to apply it to all.

Don’t fit in the model. Create one. Start small.

B like cat

March 12, 2018July 25, 2019 / jonathan / Leave a comment

So many great tips on how to get a non going outer to go out. But why?

These tips work for me around 1 out of 10 tries. Barely.

I try to go out because we are expected to. Because introverts are called to put some masks and go out. It’s good for your career and your relationships.

Careers and relationships should be based on strong enough foundations to accept non going outer.

Be like cat. Go out only if you want to. Won’t be easy but find a way.

I don’t smile enough

March 12, 2018July 25, 2019 / jonathan / Leave a comment

I can’t fake smiles. When I see someone I don’t want to smile at, or when I’m not in a good mood, I don’t smile.

I think my smile doesn’t look that good but this is probably an excuse I made.

My mask is not that good. I read a book about a king that had masks on all the time. And he was sad. He found happiness only when started being real. But I need a mask.

I feel that every feeling I feel is immediately reflected out. Happy, tired, angry, sad. I envy people with masks.

Sometimes I force myself to smile to people. “Smile and the world will smile back at you :)”. Right? Well not always. When the other person is not smiling back I feel sad. If she smiled back it makes me happy. For 10 seconds. Happiness is seconds. Sadness is days.

People are expecting to see smiles. What about authenticity? Maybe if I’d just be me it will be accepted and respected?

I am

March 12, 2018July 25, 2019 / jonathan / Leave a comment

I think and think. And absorb. I don’t talk that much.

I am trying to decide what to do and with whom.

How to create interfaces with people. How to not offend or be offended.

How to be happy and help and create.

And rest, and stare and not be guided by fear.

How to decide what to do and how to act.

To consider and hear others thoughts but not let it shift me from my way.

To what degree to be loyal to intuition. How much to listen to social conventions.

How to reduce judgments and shallowness. In me and in others.

To consume but not much so it will define you.

How to set my path.

My gut

March 12, 2018January 18, 2023 / jonathan / Leave a comment

“There’s something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming, confusing” (Linkin Park, Crawling)

I had a few days with some stress in my gut. I heard a lot of music that felt good. But the solution, which is for sure temporary, was:

Time [too much time]
Few conversations [not too much]
Sleep, alone and idle time

Music, few hugs and happy family moments were an amazing distraction. But just a distraction. Same goes to working out, which usually does the work. But not this time.

Why some things that happen stay with me for so long? I know it’s an irrelevant question although it keeps coming back in my head. Why?

When it’s better, it’s fun. I think most people feel this “fun” most of the time. “Fun” of just not feeling the gut, not thinking on the few open annoying action items I’m running from. Fun that you can find yourself just smiling.

It’s not just the feeling. It’s also a need for control, to not compromise, to set the rhythm, to maintain the values. I guess it’s time to take control. And face the fear.