“There’s something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming, confusing” (Linkin Park, Crawling)

I had a few days with some stress in my gut. I heard a lot of music that felt good. But the solution, which is for sure temporary, was:

• Time [too much time]
• Few conversations [not too much]
• Sleep, alone and idle time

Music, few hugs and happy family moments were an amazing distraction. But just a distraction.  Same goes to working out, which usually does the work. But not this time.

Why some things that happen stay with me for so long? I know it’s an irrelevant question although it keeps coming back in my head. Why?

When it’s better, it’s fun. I think most people feel this “fun” most of the time. “Fun” of just not feeling the gut, not thinking on the few open annoying action items I’m running from. Fun that you can find yourself just smiling.

It’s not just the feeling. It’s also a need for control, to not compromise, to set the rhythm, to maintain the values. I guess it’s time to take control. And face the fear.